Meditation with a baby

I think I may have already written about how having a baby forces you to be more mindful. Today again there was an example. My daughter was sitting on my knee and she was playing with

What does that mean when we change opinion so quickly?

For a couple of days or weeks you are thinking: “yeah I decided I wanted to find a job in industry A or in this type of roles” or “yes I want to apply for an MBA” or anything along the lines of “this is where I want to go or where I want to be”.

And a couple of weeks later, whether it is because someone asks you for an update on your situation or because someone tells you “there is this job opening in my firm for the type of roles you told me you were interested in, you should send me your CV”, you suddenly feel uncomfortable or scared.

“Oh no why did I tell this person that it is what I wanted. I don’t know anymore if that is what I want. Maybe I want something else. I think I know where I want to go now. I thought about it more.” Etc.

Until next time.

Why does

Update

I am still doing my back exercises

How long am I going to keep on doing my daily exercises for my back?

My back is in pain once again. After a busy past couple of weeks or months, a 3 and a half hours flight carrying 4 pieces of luggage as well as my daughter, after a day sitting uncomfortably at my desk, after a long drive home and finally after picking up my daughter from her bath, my back said “what the fuck are you doing? Why are you treating me this way?” and went on strike.

Everything is stiff and painful.

“Your back went into spasms” said the doctor. Whatever that means.

Hey body! When are you going to realise that it is ok to feel pain?

(Apologies in advance for the swearing)

It is now quite clear that my body and my mind are very similar. They are probably even very close friends.

They fucking hate discomfort and pain and they would do whatever they can to avoid it.

In this blog I mainly talk about how my mind tried/is trying/will try to avoid pain: with alcohol, avoidance, running away from negative thoughts, etc.

But this week, after another iteration of strong back pain and

Grey-area drinkers

Hello there,

Maybe I am late on this one but I’ve recently watched this Ted talk about grey-area drinkers. And let me tell you that Jolene is describing exactly how I used to be as a drinker.

But I enjoyed even more reading

Some time after week #52 – A nice evening out with friends…

For probably the first time since I am sober, I had a typical “night out” with two friends with the typical “night out” ingredients: a nice bar, dinner, catching up, talking about our current joy and problems, laughing out loud, late train back home and drinks…

Nobody ever said that these drinks needed to

Week #52 – Love

Everything is about love. And that has always been the case.

Everything has always been about love.

Everything.

We tend to think of love as this thing we feel (or not) for other people. But we tend to forget about

Week #51 – No idea

Yep. Week #51.

I am writing these words and still I have no idea what I will do after I will complete a year of sobriety in a week.

So why do I think I want to start drinking again? What’s tempting me?

Here are a couple of reasons:

Week #50 – I am spending the equivalent of $1m a year taking care of my body…

One of the things that has been going through my mind recently is the importance of taking care of my body. It is probably because I am getting older and also because with my baby daughter I appreciate even more the importance of being in good shape and easily full of energy but, yeah I recognise how important and precious my body and overall health is. Recently I read an article about how